ME3 Article: aftermath.

Wow.

I've already received comments, positive, negative, and flaming, concerning my ME3 ending article. I'd like to touch on the rage that it seemed to inspire in at least three people( so far, Lawd, run fo' yo damn lives!)

I thought I was pretty clear with why I did/wrote the things that I did, but perhaps some clarification is in order, along with another gratuitous use of Space-Kany, er... Jacob.

No one man should have all that Eezo.

Some people took issue with the Cracked-style irreverent humor. Ok, I get that. But to be perfectly frank; tough. Humor is how I deal with things. Good, bad, ugly, etc. It might seem odd to people that I'd be so lampoon-ish with something I took so many paragraphs professing my love for, but any humor writer, especially one in the geek vein, could tell you why.

We poke the most fun at the things we love.

Exhibit A: A Character I genuinely like, who has now been reduced to a gag for my article's needs.

On that front, the rage I received was mostly aimed at my use of any humor whatsoever. That somehow, by poking fun, I'm diminishing and doing more damage to ME3 than my critique of the ending ever could. Wait...what?

Listen. The only way my humor, my thoughts, or even my direct actions could "harm" Bioware's magnum opus is if I walked over to my Xbox, right now, ejected the ME3 disc 1, grabbed it and disc 2, and unceremoniously tossed them into my microwave followed by a light tap on the "popcorn" setting.

Nothing I say, or poke good innocent fun at (Innocent, barring the Shepard/Geth Porn Joke) is going to somehow affect or taint what you personally like. If that is somehow the case, that is between you, your medulla oblongata, and your grasp of the frightening minus world you find yourself inhabiting.

I PROMISE you. It's fine. really. The bad man can't hurt it.

And on the harmful words note:

One of the responses was pretty insulting, vitriol-laden, and made some interesting (if incorrect) couch-psychoanalysis of my character and sexual appetites, all in direct response to me "disliking pickles". (See what I did, there?) To that person, I've only one thing to say:

Thanks for taking the time to email me, and thank you for proving my point regarding dismissive ad-hominem argument. Also, I applaud your creative and inventive takes on the English language, and your act of single-handedly creating such new and exciting compound words and phrases. While I doubt Oxford will be ammenable to entering them into the established lexicon, you at least put forth the effort. I salute your ingenuity and ambition.

I'm Commander Shepard, and that was my favorite insensitive homophobic slur of the day.